Sometimes we must take a step back and enjoy what we have accomplished.
Not to inflate our egos and act greedy and pompous.
But so we may see our progression and how far we have come with our obsessions.
On this same bench, this time last year I was alone and depressed and cowering in fear.
crying and slowly dying, drinking like there was no tomorrow and wishing that there was no tomorrow, drowning in rum and drowning in my own sorrow.
Drawing blood from my arms like I was in debt to Dracula, writing rhymes in the night time to convince my self that I'm spectacular.
every day I used to hold back tears, and remember her face and all of those good years , I used to push away my peers for fear of becoming a burden, every day fighting my self like Tyler Durden. And everyday single god damn day I see the devil lurking, and working his plans into motion to play with my emotions, and swallow me whole like surfers Vs oceans. Mixing pills and drinks, and water from sinks for potions. And they went down easy and smoother than the lotion.
But that was then and this is now, I no longer fear why and I no longer fear how.
See I smashed that bottle and I bent that knife, I crushed those pills and I slept at night, I began to welcome the light and put a stop to the fight in my mind, I stopped wasting my time and I began to grind,
That devil that lurked I bought him to justice, murdered him in cold blood, me my self and my accomplice, this is what I have accomplished.
Punched up out the ocean to show my self that I could face any phobia, ruled upon a kingdom and created a utopia, and just when I believed I couldn't become any lonelier
I looked up and saw comrades, my brothers and my sister's, and together we created memories of happiness and took pictures
I began to appreciate my people and the world, but the strongest thing I ever did was I forgave that girl, who kept me up at night, and for whom I tried to take my life
I pushed away all of those demons and now they're gone and abolished, so now if you ask IL tell you this is what I have accomplished.