Anxiety Quarantine

Anxiety/ quarantine 

I ask if you’re mad cause I get anxious 
Anxious that I don’t mean anything to your
Anxious that my existence doesn’t make you feel something internally 
Anxious that you’re bored 
Quarantine 
I don’t know what to do anymore it’s like I don’t trust myself let alone anyone 
I have trust issues that stem from a fear of someone using me as a space filler to pass time yet I do it to them. I don’t feel guilty for it I feel alone in power my anxiety lifts 
I feel like it’s also from me always looking at my mom for approval like if I show her something I always look at her to make sure she’s enjoying it cause if she isint what is the point in me breathing or being here I’m a bothersome ooo gotta go!

I am feeling allot better about a lot of things I don’t feel anxious as much I just need to keep myself busy 😇😇! I got this I’m gobs paint my dads painting Tommorw had family time and go from there ;)  
I can do this 
I am staying
I am strong 

I can feel myself slipping into that anxious always need to know or think alot what Bruce is doing mode ugh not the greatest I thought he was taking a shower then I was like omg he’s sending dick pics cayse he took couple minutes to answer me but I also feel myself trusting him abs not worrying about that because I’m me and he’s he I should really get rid of this feeling in my stomach ok the dip side my throat feels so much better and I can breathe!!!! Ahh