The Ascent

The Ascent

It’s hopeless I feel and there’s nowhere to turn
I should probably lay down and wait to burn.
The situation I just can’t face
I don’t really feel like leaving this place.
In fact I shall stand and stay my hand
For it is too much for me
to look and to see
My eyes I shall close and I’ll lie and hope
That perhaps I’ll be blessed with some ready rope
And then maybe I’ll end it all,
for then I know I shall be small.
My eyes are closed, I’m lying still
Please don’t disturb me, forever until!

Time passes and still I lay.
But my eyes they open when I hear him say
“Wake up, wake up, all’s not lost!”
I don’t believe it, I feel coated in frost
I look through bleary eyes, straight past to the skies
And realise then that he’s full of lies
The grey and dark, the storms they rise
I lay there still, as tears fill my eyes

The pain is extreme, it builds within!
I feel myself begin to spin.
Tears cascade, streaming down
And sobbing and shaking the attendant sound
I’m lost and the loss it crushes me
I know that I cannot be free!
Trapped, enclosed and caged et al
I need a place to where I can crawl!
I’m overcome with pain I can’t bear
And yet it’s something I must wear
And I cannot see where it will end
It seems that the devil has more he can send!

Weeping, shaking, I lay still on the ground
I’m buried and lost, I shan’t be found!

More time passes, and still I lay
But once again I hear him say
“Wake up, wake up, for it can be ok!

I look at him through a haze of tears!
And recoil in shock, it’s the worst of my fears
I glance around for a means to run
For escape is now what must be done
My eyes are flitting, left to right
There’s no way I can stand and fight
I’m shaking and feeling my hands drip with sweat
On my life there’s danger yet.
A slight smile upon his face
I feel I may have lost the race
Danger looms, I have to go.
This is something that I know!
I cower back, and hide my head
For now’s the time I’ll end up dead

More time passes, still I stay
Anxious feelings, but I hear him say
“Look up, look up, don’t be afraid”
Easy for him, to have it said
I glance at him, but only brief
I hate his guts, the slimy thief
But as I look down at the floor
I must protect myself some more
“Kind sir, I see we are a team”
“How nice of you to care you seem.”
These are the words I deem to say
But in my head he needs to pay
He’s evil, a threat and seems too pleased
I wish his heart was grabbed and seized.
But still I speak with smiling face
As I glance all around, looking for space
“Kind sir how kind, and we are friends”
But really I ponder various ends
ends to his talk, to his face, to his life
For only that can end this strife
“Kind sir once more I must retreat”
“And rest again my weary feet”
And back I step, while keeping an eye
As the distances grows, with relief I sigh
For when he’s not looking is when he’ll be fought
And as more time passes I sit and plot

He speaks again, his voice is low
“Can I help? I’d like to know?”
Piss Off, just go!
Is my shouted retort
Leave me in peace, I’ve nothing to sort!
The rage explodes, bursts out from me
An incandescence, plain to see!
“You bastard, I hate you”
“Just get up and run”
“For I’m fed up of listening”
“Yes sir, we are done!”
It all looks so solid! My fist starts to curl
A punch I can feel, perhaps I will hurl
Something it stops me and I am held still
It feels like I’m taking some kind of a pill

Still and stopped is how I am
The rage subsides, like retreating tides!
But challenge builds up and accuse him I will
For I haven’t yet provided his fill!
So it is when he opens his beak
I hear the challenge in his speak
“My man, can I help?” he directs to me
But he’s glaring according to what my eyes see

“Help?! You?!” I challenge back
“That’s an ability I think you lack!”
My challenging finger prods his chest
For this I know that I can best!
I continue on without his reply
Until my mood turns
and I stand and sigh
He looks at me once again
And opens his mouth and speaks then
“My man, you know, I’m trying to help you
“If you stop and look you’ll see that it’s true.”

I sigh once more and slouch on the ground
My tone’s not varied, a monotonous sound
“Help? With what? I’m alright here”
“I can’t really be bothered with excessive cheer”
“I feel like slouching and sitting about”
“And being quite quiet, there’s no need to shout”

He offers his hand, to help me get up
I feel the lethargy, I’m filled like a cup
“Nah, I’ll be fine, I’m to slouch on the floor”
“And maybe later, I’ll do some more”

He looks at me now, a slight smile on his face
“Don’t be daft, look at this space”
We needn’t change much, we needn’t be rash
We’ll walk over there, there’s no need to dash

That seems to appeal to my slight change in mood
In fact, that wee motion sounds like it may feel good
“Ok then, but let’s not change stuff”
“Walking around will be more than enough.”
I raise myself up and brush myself down
And alter my face, its no longer a frown

I notice that speed begins to increase
And he says to me, it’s time to release
Let the laughter escape from you
You know it’s what you want to do
His voice is filled with mirth and joy
I feel that it is not a ploy
I want to move and join on in
For that’ll be the way I win
My face lights up, a smile and laugh
Life feels bright - a beautiful path
I laugh out loud at nothing at all
I feel I’ve grown, I’m mighty tall!
And faster and faster, we both start to run
And life is joyous and full of fun

Energy builds, I’m feeling enthused!
I feel I can go on, more energy unused!
I’m running and jumping and whistling wow!
I wondered on life but this is it now!
Everything’s great, my problems are nil
And all of this happened with only some will!

Hooray, woo hoo, yipee and ha!
La-di-da-di-da-di-da!