baggage

I have a recepticle
call it a bag
it doesnt exist in
the  physical
it sits on my shoulders
with chips, and my
subconscious parrot, 
in there are the files
from my life,  
like as a child..when
I was grabbed by a man,
I filed it under ' Fuck You',
unwanted pregnancy !
but not by me ? everyone
else in entirety, but I saved
my baby..even days before birth
I was on my own fighting do gooders
bleeding heart social workers at my
maternity bed..then I got my own place,
look at my face?
would you even concieve
the hard path I lead,
to then rebuild with family
who I forgive
they're a different generation.,,
filed,,'Live and let Live'
yet its my problem not theirs I said...
a family life with a cheat 
I filed that 'Do Not Repeat'
bancruptcy, repossession..its in there...
and two full years depression when, 
house, car, job, husband and dignity fled,
filed that under 'Bastard',
and then deaths of loved ones..
which turned me vegetarian to cope
with emotional stress..something to
occupy my mind..its filed under
'Items of Distress'.
and through all this, and much more
bumpth filed under 'shite Various' 
I have the utter joy of my children
Always My Brightest Light