Betrayal

That devilish grin , you win
My lust it took over it all
for him for him, why is it him
Got carried away, did I get lost?
so far away from you my love

too close off  my true feelings 
and hold my breath all day for nay
Yet again and in another way 
I fell again and again
while losing control too him.

So lost between bed -covers,
 where I obey all his whim
Where passion leads all the way, 
and sorrow it buries away.
I cant get over him, yet think of you.

Not wanting it though do I think?
to follow in sin without win
And yet my love fell away, did it?
astray for him from you without care
Why did I fall so easily

My heart is filled with sorrow
Yet it beats so fast,burdened with past
for him do I grin? for the win?
I look at him in wonder and think 
Did I? Replace you for him?