Dear Dad
Trigger warning: complicated parent/child relationship poem

Dear Dad,
Why would you choose to bring me into your world of hatred?
If you didn't have every intention of loving me?
Of giving your little girl everything that would make her healthy and whole
We bonded in trauma and humiliation
You made sure that we were both mistreated
So we could be reflections of each other
So you could become my closest and most tragic friend
I see so much of your spirit in myself, and I know others do too
I wanted only to be imprinted by your gifts
And to make everyone proud of us both
But I have a side that scares meā
And it keeps reminding meāalways
It's like you're still hereāyou and your childlike joy
Your passion, your humour
And your repressed rageāseared into my skin
And nowāI'm almost as old as you were when you had to leave
And I understand
That you're the one who most needs the kindness and tending you had not been givenānot enough
Instead you were exploited and harmed
And I hope that one day I can shower you with a deluge of that loving care
Despite every horror, I still have so much of that in me
I know, Dad
You gave everything from a heart full of holes that bleeds righteous indignation
But you gave the best you couldāwith what little you had
I know you triedā
And I love you all the more for that
Love,
Your little girl

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Comments
Very relatable for me, i had a very traumatic and tough childhood. When i found cosmofunnel it helped me to express decades of suppressed bad memories. I was appreciative of you ending it with showing love as the tone came across as you were angry or disappointed but still have accepted you still love your dad and don't entirely blame him for you are mature enough to realize he was handed down and inherited some if not the majority of the flaws. Keep writing it serves well and kudos for having strength now to share and pen.
I'm so glad you could relate. Ah, poetry helps so much. It's so nice to get it out on paper. I wasn't always so forgiving though.
You keep writing and sharing tooš We connect with our words, through the human experience.
Thank you so much for your comment!