Derriere Affair

(circa 1991)

I visit a friend
in Vermont, the
Green Mountain State.

In his rest room
next to the toilet
are moist wipes.

At age 24 I hear
about the miracle of 
moist wipe
refreshment.

I use the wipe
only to feel the
sphrinter muscle of 
my bum catch fire.

The plastic container
are not moist wipes, 
but Clorax Wipes 
full of bleach and
cleaning chemicals.

I scream like a bobcat
in the middle of the night,
sounding of a woman 
getting murdered.

It was refreshing
as an East Indian
funeral pyre.

Always read
the label 
and instructions
before application.