Drowning Memories

Beautiful rainbows and sweet sunshine,

Are all just reminders of things that aren't mine.

Stuck in this sorrow, sinking in mud,

I try to fight swiftly, as I drown in the flood.

At first I fought hard,as I choke back a tear,

But then I remembered all of the pain from this year.

I let it all go as I prayed to be free,

Then I looked to the Heavens,and it's your face that I see.

I look deep into your eyes,& I just soak up all the sun,

Your Spirit all around me,there was no need to run.

I was just so used to hiding, so I was pretty scared at first,

I thought you came to save me,while I was at my very worst.

So that morning when I woke,I was hoping I would see,

You standing at my bedside,to tell me you love me.

But instead I saw my window,that let in the morning light,

No reason to get out of bed,I didn't sleep a wink all night.

Now I'm all alone and lost,yet somehow numbed by the pain,

But I still can't stop the tears,that pour down my face like rain.

I just want to feel your presence, to help me heal my heart,

It hurts so fucking much to think,how quick our lives were torn apart.

Memories of what we had,still  to haunt me everyday,

I try and occupy my mind,but they still find me anyway.

I try so hard just to forget,that you were all I had,

But those memories... so bittersweet, haunt my heart so fucking bad!

Overwhelmed with sadness,you're always stuck inside my head,

I cry myself to sleep at night,as I lay alone in bed.

I wonder if you're near me,and if you're seeing all these tears,

That will continue falling,for the rest of all my years.

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