Giant Slay

Sometimes
you've got to be ruthless;
you've got to be dispassionately zealous;
bring forth nerves of steel
--ex nihilo;
brace yourself;
steady yourself;
grow balls;
take charge;
put you're back into it;
aim and strike
 
Sometimes
you've got to fool yourself;
pretend it won't hurt;
make the painful seem
painless;
fake hate
till you make it true that
you don't love
--that you've never loved it before:
 
The slandering
The lying
The gambling
The boozing
The smoking
The popping
The shooting up
The speeding
The quarrelling
The stealing
The fighting
The beating up
 
Sometimes
you've got to undo it:
you're humanity;
you've got to be a beast;
slay yourself like prey,
subdue it into an utter
humiliating defeat,
sacrifice it to an internal
inferno
 
Sometimes that will cost you
more than just your vice
It will leave a bitter taste
that's not very nice,
as the ones you thought were  friends
--were family--
will be nowhere to be found
 
"Depart from me, for I never knew you," may cross the threshold of their lips
right before they slam the door
And if they are more callous
than you ever could've imagined,
they'll throw your living carcass
upon a prickly cross
And if they're deeply cruel
they'll mock with taunting
at your "weakness"
 
But that's you're only way out,
for salvation comes via meekness
Knowing that you can't go on
dancing with the Devil
Is nothing to be ashamed of
He has many "partners"
long groomed on his abuse
And the only thing
that you can say to that is,
"forgive them Father,
for they know not what they do!"
 
Sometimes
you've got to be ruthless
with your inner demons
That requires the guts
to take off your mask
and stop the acting
But people get offended
when you leave their games,
or call it when their "games" are shit
 
They may take it personal
but you can't afford it:
to let that stop you
from taking back your life
with a good old fashioned
giant slay