Gone

Departed...
Empty shell left behind,
Left without a final goodbye,
Left the living behind,
Without a care.
Grief of final parting,
Worn as a shawl,
As a black cloud hangs.
Inside I feel dead.
Watch as the lid closes.
Her final closure.
What about mine?
Tears flow down grimaced features.
Gone...
Still disbelief reigns,
So young, vibrant...
How?
Never to return,
A void left behind,
If one cast a stone,
One would wait forever,
To hear the impact below.
Slumped, dragging feet,
Mourn for all to see.
...
Watch in pain the final descent,
Into earthen embrace.
Dirt rains like tears upon the casket.
Cold, no emotion,
Final conclusion,
Slow walk away, for now.
...
Alone return home,
Empty shell of a house,
Once called home,
Now icy, detached sensation,
Imparted upon entering.
Quite noise reverberates,
Resonates the desolation of merriment.
Where ever I go,
Visions await,
Accost me with their warmth.
How now to carry on?
Constant reminder of loss,
My bereavement,
Scratched open like a scab,
To bleed of your memories.
Eyes closed tight,
I can even smell you.
Flee!
Run from my madness!
Stand outside,
Our nest behind,
Continually recalling us...
Block out all the bad,
The base reason why...
Why I am in the here and now.
...
The reason I killed you!
I now have to live with this.
No one any the wiser.
Slight wry smile,
As I walk away,
My pretense once more in place,
Time to get on with my life.