I Am The Girl

I am the girl…

I am the girl who feels under appreciated but never stops trying.

I am the girl who feels abandoned by her own soul and completely lost until she finds it.

The girl who is terrified of failure because she can’t stomach the heart ache of knowing she isn’t good enough.

The girl who doesn’t know where to go or where she belongs; so instead she wanders down this lonely path of blindness.

I am the girl who keeps a smile on her face and in her heart she keeps kindness...Even though the evils of life come at her with a sword and she has no shield.

I am the girl who has been dealt heartache over and over again but still wants to search for love,

because the thought of dealing with the shittiness of life alone is almost unbearable.

And even when good things come to her, she feels that life will hand her something terrible.

I am the girl who never knows who to trust, so she trusts everyone.

Yet she knows it’s a bad idea because no one ever seems to be trustworthy.

These people she ends up trusting are those who are bloodthirsty and always out for sabotage. 

So the ending is always the same: she gets torn apart and broken.

I am the girl who seems to get kicked when she is already down.

The girl who has nowhere to go but up and can’t seem to find a way to rise.

I am the girl who always speaks the truth but when she speaks she finds nothing but lies.

The girl who can’t stop her life from spinning in circles,

Going faster and faster and faster until suddenly... she stops and falls to the ground crying.

I am the girl who is a friend to everyone but cannot seem to find a friend for herself.

I am the girl who knows so much but feels as if she knows nothing.

I am the girl who feels life is not fair to her and the girl who feels that if there is a God, she is his personal entertainment.

Watching her fail and fail and fail again.

I am the girl who seems to catch up with her life but then falls back even further than she was before.

And even though I am the girl who seems to be completely lost in her life, I am not the girl to fold the hand she is dealt. I am the girl who will bluff until not only everyone believes her but she believes it herself.

I am not the girl to stand down from a fight and let the situation beat her.

I am the girl who will find her way to the top even if it kills her!