I decipher the code of the heart

I push through the days with no hesitation. I don't bother looking behind me. I can hear the  footsteps of my reality heavy breathing. chasing me. And it's  catching up. 
I stumble over my feelings and emotions Most of my Trust and Believes  ripped or dirty from past experiences  
It feels like I've been running for hours though it's only been a few minutes. These moments seem to be endless. 
My head aches and I don't know if I can go on any longer. A thought hits me and eye wells fill  losing my breath. I gasp for air, but nothing comes in. can't run forever I glance around in all directions. Where can I go? Everything looks the same.feels the same. I shake my head. The tears stream from my eyes into my mouth. the bitterness of the taste. Reminds me of the things I do not wish to face .. so i swerve through life after the hurt through memory after memory  is this  to end, is it? 
This root snatches my mind and I fall into this state  of  unsureness the pain. I try to get pass it, but I can't stop reliving this.
I cover my head with my hands. I shiver in thought
I hear footsteps getting slower and slower until they finally stop. It's here now. 
 Foolish gullible  thoughts about myself splurts out as i stand with my shoulders lifted, for life has no time for my huffing and puffing.  so I must put on my good face and continue on with my day......