I'm not good enough

Why do I feel that I'm not good enough, that this world is so hard and so so tough. Some days I open my eyes, scared that my family and friends will see through my lies. They ask "you ok I hope", I reply yes but just keep seeing that noose in the rope. Why can't I talk and tell them how I feel, the pain the sadness it's all to real. It grows bigger and bigger every single day, like an evil entity within me it's there to stay. How can I talk to the people who care, can't be this burden I'll frighten and scare. I can't do that to the people I love, please please God send me some help on the wings of a dove. I'm a failure to the people who knew me so strong, how can I be so messed up so useless so wrong. Don't want to go asleep at night, knowing I have to wake up to feelings that cause me such fright. Can't take anymore of living this way, I'm not good enough for this world where I cannot stay. I scream I shout I yell, to whoever brought me this hell. This entity has come and it's broken me down, as I lay in the water the final seconds as I feel myself drown. Darkness consumes me all around, peace at last I've finally drowned.