Inner conflict

I don't think you understand all the pain you put me through, all the agony left by you.
I try my best to let you go, but the pain inside devours me whole.
You're my weakness and my blues, my worst distraction, my rhythm, my muse.
I can't shake the way you make me feel, so here I am, shouting my cure!

I can't remember why I cared, why I need you, Why I shared?
Why I gave you my darkest secrets? Why I let myself repeat this sequence?
I'm scared, i'm bruised, i'm falling in two. I'm afraid to hold on, but scared to lose you.

I'd say I wish you well, but that would be a lie, for I cannot hide this agony inside
I would say i'd want you back, but I don't think I could replay the same old story day after day.

I guess it's time to put this to rest, but just for tonight for my heart will protest.