Inside and Out

Sometimes negativity becomes overbearing
And the world seems to be tearing you apart
Your heart sinks 
You tremble and shrink

But being human 
we get back up again 
you realise how amazing you truely are
inside and out you’re a star

So why is it
that I seem to always fall
time and time again
unable to stand tall  

because in the whole wide world
there’s only one me
on the inside I can see
and the outside there’s no discussion
its clear, I’m disgusting

I’m afraid of the world 
of what it’ll think of me 
on the inside, my mind will flee
leaving me all alone
Numb and empty 

no one has ever been proud of me
it might’ve been said 
time and time again
but it quickly wears out
A phrase with no meaning

i wanna make people proud
instead im too loud
lost quickly in a crowd 
when I try to break free
no one ever listens to my plea

i look away from the mirror
i close my eyes not wanting to see
even then I’m faced with reality
on the inside I’m no sight to see

i can’t stop talking 
in fear I’ll hear an unwelcome sound
then I over analyse 
I critise and don’t talk, thinking it unwise
I tell lies 
So no one hears my cries 
As obvious as I can be
No one will listen 
Not to me

I’m not worth your time
There’s no self pity
When I say this 

It is what it is
I’ll never be like the rest of you
I’m tired of this loop
When doubt hits me
And insecurities double 
When I see the world around me
With little imperfections 
Everyone is perfect
Imperfection is perfection
Except when it comes to me
But day by day I’m accepting
Who i am and what I can be
Even if I’m ugly
Who even looks my way
No one of course
Now there’s nothing to say