Poem -
The Journey
on a moonless starless night
awakened in such utter fright
i started walking in despair
there wasn't time to even care...
i could see others, but not their face
as i walked along in quiet pace
a mist appeared, questions filled my brain
where i was going, would there be pain?
was i alive or was i dead?
voices echoed, crowding my head
was this my end, i did not know
was i to reap what i did sow?
i climbed aboard a midnight train
as i was lead in my vain
my life was now forever thwarted
for i was among the dearly departed
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Comments
Eddie, as always, you flatter me. Thank you my friend, for your kind comments! A lot of people have told me that they like that particular line as well, which is funny, because I pondered over weather or not to use it at all lol...good choice I guess. : )
Greetings Nrose J.,
"Very Edgar Allen Poeish.".Great write and with the mystique, of an unplanned long venture, never to want to find yourself, launched into unwillingly and against all means, of simple comprehension why.....An end, left with sheer questions, one i would not like to wake to, at least, not,"in this life time." "Wonderful imagination and wonderful poem." A bit of a story teller as well, are you, in this one...Great presentation of this poem....
My lines of gravitation, are as follows,(Although the poem as a whole,was a winner), these, (too me), were of my favorite lines spoken...
On a moonless starless night,
awakened in such utter fright.
I started walking in despair,
there wasn't time to even care...
Kind regards,
Jimmy
Many thanks Jimmy, I appreciate your reviewing this piece.
You flatter me with the "Edgar Allen Poe" comment, WOW!
: ) I look forward to both of us being able to review each
others up coming works. Blessings my friend!
Hello Nrose!! J.
Reviewing each others works,is a plus in my book and you are welcome, in your response, to my personal input, to your very enjoyable poem...Enjoyed the flow of this poem all the way through..Pleasure is mine...
Warmest regards,
Jim
A wonderful eerie dark write. Well done.
Thanks for taking the time to review Poppy! : )