Liability

Sometimes I feel like a burden.
unwanted, uninvited, undeserving.
Especially to you, you never saw me as anything but 'there'.
A second best.
A spare to the heir.

I understand- it's all a bit much.
the contrast between us is like dawn and dusk!
vivacious and bubbly?
Or dull and stuck up?

It's almost like you never wanted me.
I'm used to it. It's fine. I'm not hurt.
But coming from you- I've been left in the dirt.

Sometimes I switch off, I fall to the back-
knowing that if I keep rambling that you'll break or you'll crack.
Then I'll be alone again...
And I can't handle that.

A mind at war.
Why do I see myself this way- through a mirror of shattered glass?
Maybe it's just me..
Or pressure from my family?
A liability-
That's all I'll ever be.