Lost Love

Sometimes I lay awake at night and think about where I went wrong.
How our love was once indestructible, how our love was once so strong.
How I can still stare at you now and not see me without you, side by side.
How you were my everything, my soulmate, my heartbeat, my ride or die.
How I continue to risk our love everyday, just cause I can't face the facts.
That somewhere on the way our love took a wrong turn ,our love fell off track.
That leaving means moving across country , so very far away.
Taking the kids with me is unfair , but it hurts my heart to stay.
I'm selfish because they're not just mine but your babies to.
I just want you to understand where my head is at and what I'm going through . 
Are you still in love with me or do you stay for them?
Cause I would rather be civil and end this on good terms as friends.
I need to know the truth what really lies in your head, what really lies in your heart?
Do we find a way back to that love or do we live apart  and make a new start?