Poem -

Little Hearts that save me

Lost

My mind is never silent, berating the things I say and do.
Nobody sees the inner termoil I feel just because I know how to smile at you.
Being the strong person is hard when you feel so isolated and weak.
When you're in a group of people silently feeling like the biggest freak.
I cry when you're not looking I sob when you don't see.
I sometimes think of very dark things, wishing to be free.
Free of the constant judgement or people dragging me down.
Free of constantly picking myself up off this cold hard ground.
Alone surrounded by people who I don't trust or share a bond.
Always feeling like I don't have a leg to stand up on.
Punishing people I love, who are so precious to me. 
One look ,one smile, one touch from them makes my heart sore with glee.
My little humans help me out of this dark place that I sometimes dwell.
If I didn't have them here with me id already have a place in hell.

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Comments

author
Grace Whatsherl...

God, I relate to this so hard, it was as if you plucked the words from out of my own head. And I'm ngl, your friends probably feel the same way.

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author
Katina Woodruff...

The candidness, openness and vulnerability can be read within and in between the lines. I was intrigued to keep reading. It reads like a narrative poem. The rhyming at each line helped to move the poem along. I could hear the rhyme throughout. Good work.

Favorite lines: 

Nobody sees the inner termoil (turmoil) I feel just because I know how to smile at you.
Being the strong person is hard when you feel so isolated and weak.

The last line held the most power, but I'm not sure if it couldn't be rewritten to make it even better. Maybe by placing a comma next to (me). 

If I didn't have them here with me id already have a place in hell.

If I didn't have them here with me(,) id already have a place in hell.

Thank you for sharing your poem. Good work. 

Happy Holidays from Ohio 

 

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author
PHENG Family

Thanks I'm not to good grammatically and it most definitely could be written better ?. I appreciate your time so much more than you know. 
happy holidays from Australia.

Reply
author
Katina Woodruff...

Welcome to my world.

I'm dyslexic, been this way since birth, I think. I have the most difficulty with spelling, and writing numbers down. I transpose numbers as letters like the number 8, I often write as a lower case a. 

I say, as long as you have a good editing software program like the one offered with Microsoft Word, or Grammarly which is a free internet based program to help creative writers learn more words and write with more efficiently. I'm still unsure how to spell certain words, but learning that if you have a program like a speech reading pen, you can get the stories told to you while you read. That is where I'm heading to read a lot of books, all auditorily. 
 

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