My Birthday

It's like that, it always has been.
When I look back at memories they feel obscured
Like someone has taken the rear view mirror from my mind
And smashed it

My view of the past is obscured
But I do remember it quite definitely
As though it were yesterday
Without realising I think they gave it to me

Through my DNA.
The sadness, the mania.
It's also the affect of my actions, or lack thereof
I am not blameless, nor have I ever denied blame

I know I played a part
And I still play it,
When I don't sleep, eat, I fall back into the role
Like some wicked actress replaying her sick favourite scene

Over and over again
I thought I was over the love of you, Mania.
Sadness, I thought I'd given up on your catharsis
But it seems not so. 

To this day I remember it,
The day I was born.
I remember it because it happened yesterday
I was born yesterday.

Yes, I'm a fool. A fool for thinking I could outrun
The inevitable.
Outrun my genetics, my destiny.
And it can't be helped.

I know, I know it creates sadness;
To see the truth so bare, so raw, bleeding out over
The corners of the mental images I play in my head
As I remember: I remember it now, the day

The day I was born. My Birthday.