My Pain

The shiver in my heart when I hear your name.The tears that fall when you touch me again. The marks you leave on my skin when I say no. The memories of your face,your touch, your voice. My pain brings you satisfaction,my suffering brings you happiness, my tears give you joy, my fear help you sleep at night, my nightmare,my enemy, how's dare someone like you tell me you love me,when you bring me pain, how dare you tell me it'll help my future when I'll always be afraid to take a step forward or backwards. You bring me pain, you made me give up, your nothing to me, your the reason why I'm afraid of everything and everyone, the reason why my trust is FUCKED UP!! I HATE YOU but my heart loves everyone,but it has no space for such cruelty such neglect towards a ten year old child. I used to wonder why do you need my small body to satisfy you when you can have all the grown women in the world but now i know your sick, you disgust me. How can you live with yourself knowing that a little girl is in pain, Knowing that you ruined her childhood.Your nothing but a monster. Someone like you should be stuck in a coffin. You shouldn't have a family. Why is it so hard to see the tears my eyes, the struggle of keeping a smile on my face, the lies I tell someone "I'm fine".  Its you who bring me down, its you who ruin my trust,its you who make me afraid to go home,afraid to stay alone