No acid on my face just war paint

Its always something that I find out new, 
I keep thinking of everything we've been through. 
I keep thinking I love you but yet I don't want you back,
I keep wishing for our forever but faith is what I lack. 
As I sat with my counsellor and  discussed what you had said, 
your image, your name; it hasn't left my head. 
You say you love me, but what is it you show? 
In my face acid is what you said you throw. 
I googled that model, she was left scarred,
And the boyfriend she was with; he was left barred. 
Do you think that is okay? do you thnk that I am fine? 
Im just too loving, and I just wanted you to be mine.
You treat me like Im property a toy you use to rent, 
Or when you have a problem you contact me to vent. 
I swear my love for you in true and it will never really die, 
But day in and day out I am living a lie. 
Im lying saying you will change, and that you know better, 
But under my eyes when I think they become wetter. 
The things youve said, and things youve done,
I want you back when times where fun. 
But sadly, the line has be crossed, 
And my trust in you I've lost. 
Im starting to value myself, and value my time and thoughts,
But in circles my mind goes thinking about all the times we've faught. 
Truth is your a demon, but I promise Im not a saint, 
One day I will have scars on my wrist, labeled war paint. 
I cannot and will not allow you to defeat me, 
I will not let you try, 
Because baby I'm stronger, with every single day that I'm alive.