Our kids

When your kids are ill your whole world comes skidding to a halt. 
annoyed work colleagues but for me it's my college,
missing out on my learning as it's my son that really matters....
I may get a qaulification at the end of it but hey if i fail cos ive looked after my son?
then I'm sorry world but my love for my kids is more strong.
it's stronger than the need to learn,
for now that can go on a back burn,
I can come back to the job title I yearn.....
but for now my kids come first,
not my college lecturer or some jumped up office clerk!
it's not as if my dang body was built to work....
I've said it before,
I'm falling apart,
so I'd rather spend my son's ill days together and not spread apart.
They need me like I need them,
For to many reasons it's to hard to pen.....
we vent and we articulate our expressions and apprehensions,
we bent the rules and changed all their suffocating meanings,
turned them inside out and transformed years of verbally abusive words,
that have affected my feelings. 
but my whole world stopped and skidded to a halt and not through my kids visible illnesses,
but the ones hidden,
deep in their innocent minds,
that you caused when you left us all behind....
I'm here to pick up the pieces as that's what I do,
I'm there for my kids,
where are you?
or more to the point where have you been,
thinking grass is greener,
over there is a better sheen....
well I hope you've learned tour lesson in life,
cos I know I have,
definitely not to trust you as a wife.....
as a mother a mum,
a lover or friend,
you'll stab anyone in the back till you get it your end....
do you even realise the bulldozer of destruction you've left behind,
all the pieces I've had to pick up,
some the hardest to find.....
but I've stayed strong for my 3 little boys and I'm always here for them in sickness and in health,
just so they know that at least one of us truly loves them and doesn't care about ones wealth....
cos that a all you  are interested in.
Definitely not our boys,
so go back to that rock and stay there cos you are not wanted here,
by me or them no more!