Reality Interrupted

Reality Interrupted 

Reaching out with a troubled heart.
Turmoil of mind, where to start?

Thoughts self harm are all around.
Unexplained sources of unsound.

A blade looking for pain to promote.
An artist’s song, finding a final note?

I do not want this , it is not me.
What truth am I lacking to set me free.

“ You horrid creature, look what you have done.
The pain inflicted, no battles won.”

“Your better off in the dirt,
Lest your being, brings more hurt.”

Beaten down , I hope to rise once more.
Dear God, please do not close your door.

These thoughts and feelings I do not understand. 
While I must believe I'm in your hand.

This day I'll push through, to find tomorrow's song.
It’s of  friends that love and want me strong.