REASON FOR INSANITY

I've got lead in my brains weighing me down and there are only so many OPIOIDS I can take before I fail to extinguish this round

I'm holding you now, tightly gripping your cold frame, wishing you away from the disturbing thoughts I feel every day 

It's not enough to fire you into empty space or the wooden targets of Humanities face, I want the splinters to bleed, to see the devestation you were created for

​​​​​​I want to pour this bottled up war I've hidden away and submerg myself into ten minutes of chaotic play just so I can feel something, anything at all

I'm ready to spill my rage all over this obtuse life, to break the mould of the mundane and drown away my pain in a shower of liquid decay. 

Note: I'm trying to put myself into the minds of these people who commit  mass shootings but I dont want to OD on prescription drugs and I also don't have access to guns. It's quite difficult.