reconciliation

This goodbye has been a long-time coming,
but it's only fair to us both
that I make it.

I'm sorry I gave you too much,
that I loved too much,
or too harshly.
I held you to a standard
that you could not reach,
and for that I am sorry as well-
because I should have never
thought you anything more
than human.
Your eyes are just brown,
lacking the magic
I attributed them to.
Your hair is messy,
not like crashing waves
but like the wreckage you left
when you walked away.
Your hands create just as much strife
as they do wonder,
and I'm sorry for only seeing
the good in you.
I tried far foo long
to make you love me back,
and I'm sorry
that I waited outside,
long after you had shut the door.

As I say this, though,
I am not the only one here
with confessions to make.
Though I know you will never admit to me
that this was always just
a one-way-street,
you need not say it
because I already know.
You never really cared
like you said,
but instead led me to believe
I meant something
to a boy who gave nothing.

I wish I could take back
my ignorance,
but I'm glad I made the mistakes I did,
because now I know
that I was fighting a losing battle.
You had already won the war.
Please take this,
and call it my version
of a white flag.

I thought if I gave you everything
that you would give some of yourself
back.
Thank you for teaching me
that some people
never will,
and that's okay.