Poem -
Sometimes
I dwell upon the thoughts, I feel about myself.
I struggle to believe, Iām worth anything at all.
I question all things, I disagree to understand.
Iām always asking why, I am the person that I am.
I try to be someone, I know that I am not.
I feel I shouldnāt deserve, the life Iāve even got.Ā
Because sometimes, Iām just not strong enough to breathe.
Because sometimes, I just want my heart to fall asleep.
Because sometimes, my pain is to much to bare.
Because sometimes, I only suffer when all I do is care.
Ā
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Comments
Hello TIANA!!
This write is SCREAMING out 'DEPRESSION' between these amazingly well crafted lines of such unique/original candor as to be universally representative of 'so many' in this world who are dealing with their own struggles in life...... it is delivered like in an almost Anthem -Like fashion with some truly unforgettable phrases ~
Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā Ā ~ "Because sometimes, I just want my heart to fall asleep.."
Lines like that stand out and are VERY much a succinct summation of the intent of the whole!!......ALL STARS!! & PINNED!!..... because when you read this aloud..... it packs a serious wallop and brings tears!!..... well done dear poet sister!!.......LOVE & ROCKETS!!......T xo ?ā¤
Ā
Thankyou so much for your feedback and compliments on my way of writing. I appreciate and it really means a lot to hear what someone else thinks, to hear what you as a fellow writer thinks!Ā
It made me happy to be very honest and thatās the biggest reward in writing and in life itself.Ā
Itās been awhile since Iāve shared new writing content with Cosmo but I should be getting back into the drift with it and hope to show you all.Ā
Hope you enjoy this and the more that come soon. Thanks again for the kind words. :)
Ā
Stellar. This resonates and sounds like it is in my head. Doubt can be so debilitating. Often I get stuck on "I should". Your write said it all so well. Blessings,
Rebecca
Honestly thank you all so much for your comments it inspires me to find my true potential.Ā
A lot of individuals in the world, including myself can easily go through some days, like they are content with their life and give of the impression that they are āhappyā or ādoing wellā, but sometimes at those moments only words can truly tell the story of the depth we cant feel discreetly.Ā
And for those who can read this and personally relate, just know there is someone who understands how and what you feel despite different circumstances.Ā
Thankyou :)
Universal agonies so poetically expressed....?
That makes two in a row I have read by you. Amazing detail to the format, the sound of the poem and the repeating words in the poem. I just read, "Begin Again, Never Over," and, I wanted to mention that in my review because I'm really hoping that all members here will get the opportunity to read it. I enjoyed it so much, I want to print it out and hang it in my office as a poet's golden rock find. Thanks for the inspiration.Ā
You put a lot of work into your poems, it shows!
I read it for the second time and am convinced, you have a strong lyrical voice that drives the reader to read it more than once. This may be the type of poem; you could explore in making an "audio version" of your poem in a program like: Audacity.
It's free to use, you just need an external microphone to record your voice, or with music in the background.Ā
Audacity Download: FREE!Ā
https://www.audacityteam.org/download/
Thank you for your thoughts, honestly reading all your responses is making me feel real good about myself and my work and it makes my eyes water! ???
I actually have used audacity before and I think itās great! Will definitely have to have a go at incorporating my work into it and see the outcome.Ā
Thanks again! Appreciate it dearly ?
Ā
Your welcome.Ā
Have a happy New YearĀ
Full of new inspiration, clarity and joy.Ā