traces

it is not the things
that I strive to remember
that sadden me and
make me cry
but those things
that I cannot forget
 
if it were possible to forget
a sea of memories
it wouldn't be happiness
that would fill that space
there would be only oblivion
nothing that could serve
as cover or companionship
during the long and cold
winter days
when the things of the past
are most longed for
 
although
nothing lasts forever
some memories last
a lifetime
I carry them inescapably
with an au naturel smile
in a mixture of warmth
cold and melancholy
 
tight to the body
like fine pieces of clothing
over and beneath my skin
like indelible tattoos
proof that I have lived
I've been happy, I have loved
I've been loved and
the trajectory...
has been all worth it