Traffic Light

I'm red...

enraged...bitter...angry...

I'm red because I'm hateful....I'm red because I'm resentful...

I'm enraged because I am not where I want to be...

I was the “chosen one”...

I was better than everyone else...or so I was taught.

I was supposed to have the perfect life.

But I didn't pay attention to the signs.

Caution…Yield….Stop

It couldn't possibly have worked.

Doomed from the beginning.  Born in sin.

Vows exchanged..

I know because I was there.

Should have been me...but it wasn't...

I shouldn't have...but I did.

I paid in the end...paid dearly.

I couldn't maintain it.

I tried everything I could

Even changed corners..

Karma...

Now..

I'm green...

envy....jealousy...spiteful...

I envy your spirit...I envy your resilience...your ability to shake it loose...

Bounce back.. Brush ya' shoulders off...stand tall

Bent but never be broken

Indestructible

You a baaad mutha…shut cho’ mouth!

I hate that about you...never waver

I've been broken....battered....beaten...bruised

Transformed my soul..

Shattered my spirit...

Damaged goods...

Green means go...and they do

They never stay long...

Pedal to the metal....

Zero to Sixty in 3 seconds flat...

They learn and they burn...rubber that is

They say it couldn't be ALL of them...it has to be me

So yeah, I'm green

Because I couldn't keep it together

But the next ones did...

I'm yellow...

scared...mistrustful...a coward

I stay in the shadows...lurking

Doing my damage from a distance

Throw rocks and hide my hands

Scared that someone may find out who I really am...

Trust no one....not even.....myself

I'll throw you a fake smile...

Then I'll throw you some shade...

Hoping against hope that you'll never succeed....

But praying even harder that you never find out that it's me...

It was I who placed the knife in your back...

Remember that last embrace?...

Shhh....mums the word...

Quiet as kept...

I'm the jackal....

Clean up the scraps

After the battle

Then  slink back to the comfort of my lair...

To wait for the light to change again....

© Sean M. Macon 2013