Trigger pulled or trigger pushed

A bullet riddles thru like a poem of pain then blue . 
Like the venom of a snake bite burning it’s shell as it revolves its case and point through 
          Like a stage of mind present but changed maybe a little crazy from the pain 
So opening up more cents to make positive change 
The first point of contact in this interaction between u and u or the man in the dark at a range squeezing out there rage 
   The trigger snaps past that release of or change in mind reach  so the shell
 pops and point makes its mark for the the snap and seize to take its start 
  The venom works it’s way from lead to fire piercing the head and living now dead layers 
  It’s time for the heart and mind that’s left to start there prayer
 as the light gets bright and the awareness knows it’s broken and beyond just tears. 
 Where do we go from hear
our halos in at the brain where it’s spot began soft but our wings are in there heart that’s flight is near 
  It’s a flurry as our soul begins this overdose of the trigger pushed not pulled
 but so full
It felt like a bullet just went through 
      The veins are silent so the bodies stiff as a board yet I can still see everything
 I cant talk or move my limbs 
not even bat my eyes or twist my lips 
  It’s like a choice so I listen to this or resist 
If I decide it’s a dream will my body follow what my brain tries to lead or am I fools gold and when I fall for that sleep I’m gone buried in that forever sleep waiting for that forever dream that may not show so I’m will not trust looking for light at the end of a rainbow 
   Is this that point where the doctors have done all they can do so that’s why they say it’s up to me and my will to live that I’m losing but I can still view 
Do I prove I’m good enough for the end of this venoms affect to push out as easy as the last drip by then drank so pulled in 
Can I fire the last trigger of the last bullet that these drugs have death sentenced me as the last bits of its existence chemically pass beyond memory 
3 years clean and still here after pulling that trigger that got me to deaths door and that near 
That’s the story so yes u do see your life flashing before your eyes and chat with the big man and that inner light and life’s plan 
But u also have time in the eyes after or before that where u can chose to wake up and live that life flashed or as much of that plan 
  Like a contract signed and soul released u make that choice and it comes with responsibilities 
Be it the long term death so the addiction until
U just give up or the one where u chose the come back and u put down the pen and pick up the ink . 
Describe the horrors that are real just in between blinks 
The high is over but the poison is still playing it’s bite u put in more pointed time than this bit of sobriety you’ve managed to ride 
So it’s gonna play tricks it’s gonna show it’s horns as long as u let it 
Eventually u chose does this poison end with a heal then bigger steps and positive moves 
or does it stop here and now where u find U 
               seers to share about the existence in the spirit of the blues while u improve the rhythm of life’s moves . 
Death took me and hasn’t let go until the soul of the evil is resisted beyond the time of the poison I put in so come revealing and all the way to a healthier home . 
        I was pushed to the choice and chose the seize and these were the things I seen 
   Now spirit is a world a can connect or retreat and if u are familiar it’s not a choice to return on that faith and fate so we become more sensative to super natural natures and the reveal is our contract to return to life so this is the beginning of my poetry of the truth about life into death and back . 
   The drugs are the contract with the dark or shadows 
The death or seizure of the heart then contract back is to learn through the craziness pinned up form this slower paced death or reverse by sharing the light and adding positive perspectives
          So if you’ve taken this ride or haven’t then don’t but remember it’s a sentence and u heal stronger or just heal but it’s up to u how far your soul goes when enlightenments toppled in faith as pure truth  
   Be kind so u don’t have to rewind so much and ultimately face that as your final account to judge . 
The more good in life we do the larger the spirit grows and fills the feet soul to the to one soft spot halo hole 
Our positive growth pure positive soul with an open awareness to how to tend this garden of light and keep a positive progressive roll . 
    I’ve faved death I know his art that’s the positive of all my negative sentence I turned from craziness inti enlightenment . 
   I’ve lots of light to offer but I’m here through poetry so I poe it meaning lace life’s poetry my last lame poe be my poe trees all Heart all truth and the things I know from the hell of my pains all the way from deaths memory to deaths floor .