What is reality?

Why does my mind travel, why does it drift off. I'm losing it. I think. Storming swirling around, thoughts, memories all take me away to a world. My world, of bliss, maybe fear, Something I strive for but don't think I'll reach. I want to experience reality. I'm living in a bubble, something happens to me I, I'm numb to the world, I want to wake up, I want to wake up. But my life isn't a dream, it's not it can't be. My screams are silent, no one can hear them, but in my mind they are the loudest thing, why am I feeling this way, why can't she relate, is there something wrong with me, or maybe there's something wrong everyone. Is everyone crazy, has everyone lost their mind, or did I find mine too early. Again I drift off, lose sight of my consciousness, I think I go somewhere, where is that, what is this place, is this where u go when u die. I don't want to die, I want to stay, I am dreaming, but it is a pleasant dream, it feels real. I want to scream, I need to scream, I need someone close to scream to. To tell them my thoughts, so they could understand, I need to say something. She won't understand, why doesn't anyone understand. There's something wrong with me, something poisoning in my head, I want to sleep, I crave it, but I don't want to go, I can't leave, where do I go, I'm afraid. I'm afraid of where I   go