Why

Why I ask you
Of all the things you could've done you choose this
You decided this
I have one question
But you cannot answer
Why is all I ask
Why am I your daughter
Why are you my parent
You say it's because I need it 
You say it will help me become an adult 
At thirteen 
I'm old enough to do your work
But for anything else I'm too young
You say you will teach me how to act like an adult
Do I need to become an adult
To clean and cook
When you apparently do everything 
I mean you carried me for 9 months
You bought a house and food
Food a necessity for a child
Something you have to give, to be a decent parent 
But decent isn't enough for you, is it
You want to be praised for what you did to me
Why is it so important to be praised
I never saw someone so full of themselves 
In front of me you abuse and humiliate me 
But when I do something good I am praised behind my back
Look what my darling did she's so smart you say
Stop saying you're so smart you yell in my face
Are bruises and scars not enough must you yell too
I'm slowly becoming deaf blind and mute
What's the point of listening when you never listen to me
What's the point seeing if you can't see the real me
What's the point of talking when you can't hear my voice
Why bother
I cannot name a single nice thing you did 
What about you
Name one good thing you did to me
Before you answer cross basic needs
I'm a human of course I need water
I'm a human of course I need food
But what's worse is that
I'm just a kid, a teenager
As much I won't admit I like attention so I do silly things
Something a kindergartener would do
The earliest memory I have is in kindergarten 
In fact all the earliest memories I have were at school
My earliest memory of home are horrible 
So I'm not sure how long it's been going on
Was it so bad that I permanently erased it from my memory
Even now memories are in third person 
I see it happening to someone else 
Because it can't be me
It can't
So why I ask myself 
As I child I think it's my fault
All my fault 
As if I asked for this
Maybe if I didn't do this or that
A child shouldn't be thinking that
Children make mistakes
They are supposed to 
I shouldn't even be writing this 
Why am I writing this 
Maybe for people to know they're not alone
But physically we are
I remember reading a book and it said
Why should I punish you for something that was an accident 
That when I realized something definitely wasn't right
Even when i did it by accident 
They would do it again and again 
I remember child services came
But I said nothing
Why didn't I say something I wonder
Maybe if I did I wouldn't be here
Even then I would worry
Because subconsciously I'm still trapped in the memory
Trapped in my own mind
I remember when I was younger I had a dream
Someone was stabbing me but I didn't feel anything
Each stab I felt nothing
Stab stab stab
Nothing nothing nothing 
I realized now that , that means I have a mental shield 
And I still do
But why should I have one now
Why couldn't you've just been a real parent
A real parent doesn't hit their child cause they feel insecure 
A real parent doesn't punish their child but by repeatedly hit their child
A real parent doesn't make their child feel unwanted 
A real parent builds a relationships with their child 
A real parent takes time to nurture their child 
When my siblings cook or help me with homework you don't even thank them
But it's not like we would accept it 
Why
Because why should you thank us for something you should be doing
I see a stranger in your eyes when I once saw a father/mother 
But I guess I always knew you were like this
I just did want to accept it
Because why would my parents do this
Why,why why
-A Thirteen Year Old Girl