"Winter wanderlust"

Standing still whilst my feet are planted firmly in the openness of the crunchy white snow, I look up in hopes and anxious that I would see your memorizing smile lure me in closer to your home felt body once again, but its all in my head. My imagination is taking over once again to deal with how alone I feel since you left. The eerie branches on the tree in this winter wonder land. Or must I say wanderlust.  Or so it seems to be for me. Eerie. The cold snowy air I feel alive with my eyes wide open but yet my body is standing still struck from the brace of the cold mouth fogging winter air. Whilst I am standing still stiff shivering inside. I pull my hair out of my luscious ponytail as i am looking into the mirror of lies and self fornication. My finger tips brush across my lips.. I strike a pose for myself. I KNOW THAT I AM GORGEOUS. I KNOW IT!!!. YOU HAVE TO SEE WHAT I SEE YOU JUST HAVE TO. HOW CAN YOU NOT!!! HOW!!!!! I need help from the agony of  your deep, lustful gut wrenching LOVE that fills my brain with the entire universe within a millisecond. Oh that MILLISECOND!!!! As I grip my finger tips inside of the palm of my hands in hopes that you will come back to me. As I pull my hair with both of my hands, and my eyes as open as the blue sky, as I bite my lip and grit my teeth. As I shake my head with the lust that you left behind for me to keep. My body aches in pain because you are away. So I open my fists I wipe my nose, I stretch all of my fingers wide open as if what I just experienced did not happen to me. NO!!!!! NEVER me.