Poem -
pretty with red
my friend, I confess, I have ripped
out the moon, I am want to crave
darkness and solitary gloom...
I am tired of all the great sins that
she lights, I am tired of hurt and
of life and of fight...
and my friend I confess it was I
ruined day, twas I called down night
and blocked all light away but,
this darkness is soothing and
pretty with red, and my energy
wanes as my life bleeds to dead
friend I am sorry to write you so
blue, but my heart cannot beat on
in worlds so untrue...
so my friend be not troubled, be
glad if you can, I am made by the
lord and back to him, I run
M P 20/2/22
Β
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Comments
Bugga, for some reason I seem to have lost my review note .. not that it was much cop, but it did make me chuckle ..
Dare I suggest this is very noir M, even for you & despite the splash of red that you so deftly applied for good measure and effect ..
The abrupt concluding line caught me off guard & was quite unexpected .. I dunno why, but it was ......... maybe its just me and a dash of jet lag & tequila thrown in ... x
Aw well...to quote 'our Ricky'...
"that's just the way it is now"...lol
and not so 'noire' Nev, death is a major part of life and once our Lord has placed it in the forefront of our minds...well, sometimes it never leaves. That's why he and I fall out so much π...plus I'm sure I have plenty upbeat, positive, life affirming little offerings you could have read instead...um...somewhere...definitely...somewhere...ummm....
on a serious note...thankyou!! so much for even bothering my friend, hugs x
Good old Ricky eh' .. I would be a liar if I denied the fact that every now and then maybe, I might get it wrong .. but then, that's poetry for ya innit .. Hug reciprocated x
No ...you didn't get it wrong Nev, I think about death and its implications all the time, I write about it all the time. You never get it wrong...how could you being as prominent as you are within mental health, your comments are perfect every time my friend x
You got me guffawing into my mid mane coffee Marion .. :) x
Always happy to raise a smile ππ
:)
Powerful writing Marion. The utter depth of pain is felt and the lifeless sensation towards the present is finely etched in your most darkest Β write so far. Dark for the reader who by the end line just wants to cradle the author and help them see their self worth on this earth. Your pen is powerful my beautiful friend π love and hugs xxx
Gwen your beautiful and generous soul displays itself in all your work and all your thoughtful comments...I know how hard this must be for you to read and in some ways I wish you hadn't. On a plus note I've started painting again...very badlyπ¬π...but it fills a space that would otherwise remain black. I will message you soon...I.miss our chats...much β€Β
Awe Marion I am so happy to read that you are painting again ππ I do hope you let me in on what you paint. It is a lovely way to lose oneself for a moment. I hope it helps even just a little. Looking forward to hearing from you my lovely friend π many hugs xxxxΒ
Sent you my offering on.messenger lol xx