A wicked mind thinking about his sweetheart

The content of this article is from reality and any similarity in events, personalities or names is no coincidence. It is all intentional.
Reading this article, you will notice that the subjects are scattered and you’ll be jumping from one to another.
 
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“The perfect being, huh? There is no such thing as perfect in this world. That may sound cliché, but it’s the truth. The average person admires perfection and seeks to obtain it. But, what’s the point of achieving perfection? There is none. Nothing. Not a single thing. I loathe perfection! If something is perfect, then there is nothing left. There is no room for imagination. No place left for a person to gain additional knowledge or abilities. Do you know what that means? For scientists such as ourselves, perfection only brings despair. It is our job to create things more wonderful than anything before them, but never to obtain perfection. A scientist must be a person who finds ecstasy while suffering from that antimony. In short, the moment that foolishness left your mouth and reached my ears, you had already lost. Of course, that’s assuming you are a scientist”, an anime quote that I shared a couple of days ago on Facebook, though that I think there is perfection in this world. Nah it’s not like I’m about to say that I found perfection in her, all I meant is that there is a perfect being called “God”. But wait a minute, what if she is a Goddess! Yeah yeah I know that sounds cliché but who cares.
Enough about perfection, I prefer writing about her. You know “her”, that short tall girl, with the long medium dark light hair and the brown eyes. That shy smile of hers, when I start talking about the scandals that I made, while I’m telling myself to stop but it’s not like I can control myself nor my actions when I’m with her. I’m talking about a soul, a pure one that has got my meta-attention, not only my attention which is limited to the physical existence, while my meta-attention exceeds the physical existence to reach the spiritual one.
As a child, I have always had many enquiries about astronomy and the outer space. Have you ever watched the two movies: Interstellar and I origins? Both of them are two different movies, one about the outer space and black holes, while the second one is about the origins of the eye. If you google “black hole” you’ll find the following definition: “In astrophysics, a black hole is a celestial object so compact that the intensity of its gravitational field prevents any form of matter or radiation from escaping it.” Now moving to I origins, which focuses on the human eye. On a personal perspective, I think that the human eye can sometimes act as a black hole, being so intense and preventing any form of life within a lover’s soul from escaping it after having a look at it. Back again to both “Her” and the two movies, you’d think that there isn’t any type of similarities between the three of them. Well, there isn’t.
Something that people need to know is that you don’t choose your passions; your passions choose you. I hate to bring this up to you, but I guess I’m going to dilute the case again. When it comes to love, you’re simply not the one choosing what your heart desires. Same thing as passions, after all the person you like will become similar to your passion. In some places, they used to or still do live as tribes. Personally, I consider the human brain and heart two different tribes. If you’re a fucked up person and you tend to generate emotions for more than one person, whether they are from the opposite or same sex, you’d think the same as me that they are two different tribes. Your brain tends towards someone, while your heart tends towards another one. Maybe I'll try, not to love you only when I'm drunk or high. I didn't promise, I only said maybe and in this case I assure you that "maybe" tends towards 0. I'm a liar, I tend to lie a lot. I'm just telling you this so that you don't believe everything I wrote, though that I want it to be believed. Or you can just believe what you read and figure things out. I guess I shouldn't write something for you. I think I can survive. Damn I'm good at lying.
Some people drink to forget, and some drink to remember. I loathe people who drink to forget or to make some hard decisions that they didn’t have enough courage to make while being sober. That’s why I loathe myself. Dad if you ever got the chance to read this, know that though I wrote this I did not drink. Or maybe I did, focus dad, go up by 5 lines and remember that I said I’m good at lying.
If we ever get the chance to party together, maybe we should stick to holding hands instead of dancing. Or maybe we could ask the bartender to pour us some love. After all, it won’t be worse than Gin or Pastis.
I always thought that I’m unstable when it comes to relationships, but never thought of myself as a playboy; until recently when a friend of mine told me that and it did make sense.
Sometimes I think that I am schizophrenic, or maybe that’s just how I feel. I guess that having a good and a bad side doesn’t necessarily mean that you have a split in personality, after all everyone does have two sides. The good thing about all of this, is that I know there is someone right there who believes in me and who sees the good in me. You’d never want to lose someone like that.
Escaping reality isn’t always that bad, everything is two sided even escaping. After a second thought, escaping wasn’t and will never be bad. I had three thoughts in my mind while writing this. The first one is escaping reality for a whole weekend, being alone with someone that means a lot for you, not necessarily a lover you people. Honestly, that was one of my best weekends. The second one is the way of Hammadi Khlifi and the third one is listening to Rita.
Seriously Mahmoud Darwich, you’re one lucky man to experience such love. After all, a life with love is a life being lived.
 
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I’m the one who is responsible for every decision in my life. Each one of those decisions will have an impact on my life and maybe on the lives of others too. After sharing this article, things may change and may not. But one thing is for sure, never regret something you did whatever it is.