"**AMORE**"

I grabbed my cup of tea for a quick break before taking the new admission awaiting bed in geriatric unit.My colleagues were busy discussing their schedules and work pressure.Reading the news paper is a challenge now a days,time factor is the main key."Life has turned so busy,between ,work and kids",Laura said to me."Yes Laura ,mine the same,since Andrew and I broke up,life is a busy ride,see you later,I have to take up a new admission..."I rushed to the unit.I saw a woman in her mid 60's,wearing light green top and beige skirt very busy talking on her mobile ,standing beside a very tall man over six foot  in his grey PJ's lying in bed no 4,appeared not shaved and showered since months.He appeared very gloomy .  I read the name of my new patient from the file,and started to collect life history by introducing myself to them,"Hi Mr  and Mrs.Murphy , I am Ariel Powell, staff nurse in this unit,Could we start the admission formalities". Mrs.Powell a very pleasant woman, discussed with me regarding Richard Murphy a retired Marine Engineer .He had a great life,with two kids settled overseas. Three months ago, Mr.Murphy collapsed in a party .He had a massive stroke and his left side is paralyzed,he is compos mentis but unable to perform his daily activities,for full assistance.During  assessment ,I tried to initiate a conversation with Mr. Murphy but he appeared to be weary in the conversation.Introduced all the usual routines in the unit. Carried out all the other lab  routines and observations.After a shave and shower Mr.Murphy transformed into an eye candy.

Next day morning ,  staff reported  Mr.Murphy as very rude, always unhappy about the service. During my rounds ,on conversing with Mr.Murphy,I realized he is totally frustrated and depressed with life . As once he,told me  ,"if i could walk,i will get up and walk out of that door,never turning back." To boost his spirits, Mrs Murphy requested a private room for Mr.Murphy,same was arranged .Many activities were provided to the patients to  divert the mind ,but Mr.Murphy preferred to stay in his room in his special chair ,unruffled.Unlike other patients ,Mr.Murphy never watched T.V nor  heard radio neither shown interest in participating in various sensory stimulating activities held in the unit exclusively for rehabilitation.Just he preferred to sit in his room alone ,pecefully .I got fascinated by his behavior,how a man can sit in his chair from 08.30am in the morning till night 21:00.And again in bed  till next day morning.I perceived him wilting with in his body.Somehow I wished him to be cheerful .Thrice a day ,I ensured he is alright ,initiated dialogues and listened carefully to him, liberally.Initially ,he disregarded my approach,signals me to leave ,shaking his head in disappointment with dysarthria, of not able to produce a continuous speech .But as days passed by ,he started to enjoy my company for few minutes.Mr.Murphy slowly started to blend into the system ,but still remain very lonely.Don't want to get out of his room,now his world of silence.

Today I finished my shift early before leaving as usual,I went near to Mr.Murphy to say bye,don't know why I started to take  give more attention to Mr.Murphy.As I was about to leave,carer informed that Mr.Murphy looking for nurse , as he is complaining of headache.I went immediately as ,he had history of  hypertension.On observation,his vitals were stable,given him analgesia,waited for 30 minutes to see how is hie condition,as I don't want to leave him in pain and go.Mr.Murphy still appeared to be in pain ,I wanted to try the touch therapy ,head massage,. I recommended ,by saying Mr.Murphy,"Shall I massage your head ,sometimes it helps". He looked into my eyes and gestured yes .I warmed my hands and gently pressed his temples ,gliding my fingers into his forehead then all over the head .Mr Murphy appeared very relaxed ,enjoying the massage by closing his eyes .I asked him ,"How do you feel now ,Mr.Murphy?"but told me in broken speech",its there"...but hekept looking in my eyes,could see a shine,a trust and he smiled.I said good bye and rushed home as already ,I was late swiping off my exit from the unit.

I had an intense feeling brewing for Mr.Murphy,a longing to be with him .Wished if my shifts to be 7 days a week but i know the rules.Eagerly I started my morning rounds,brought my medication trolley near to his room,could hear the carers talking to Mr.Murphy.my heart was pounding fast,for unknown reason.Shelly ,a carer said,"Nurse I gave the tray to Mr.Murphy,he is waiting for his tablets".I said,"I am going in there now ,Shelly."I went near to his bed with his medications .I felt as he was eagerly waiting for me,Shelly came inside the room and asked Mr.Murphy ,"would you prefer a wash or shower ?".He doesn't bothered to hear her question,with a magnetic smile without a blink gazed at me.I repeated the question back with a smile ," Mr.Murphy would you prefer a shower or wash ?". He smiled and said, "Richard,call Richard ,whatever suits you". I said to Shelly"a shower would be a better idea ."I felt a spark between our smiles and a longing in his eyes,didn't think much about this developing amore ,where it will take,heart wished to flow like a river and did ..Later,in the afternoon endorsement ,Shelly informed regarding purplish hue in Richard's rt.big toe.Even though ,I was finishing my shift ,my heart didn't permitted me to go, without observing him.I never had this intense feel to meet him and to support him . .I kept wondering ,why an adulation towards a hemiplegic man ,who should be hoisted in and out of the bed.It's not lust but a deep adulation brewing between us.And I can feel the same vibrations from him too.Knocking on his door ,I said "Hi Richard ,could I  check your  right big toe?",.His face lit  up on my sight and vice versa .I sat on the floor,removed his socks,and found an infected nail .Kept his foot on my lap, cleansed the wound and done dressing ."Richard ,I finished my shift now .Going for a for three days break,so meet you after three days .Richard suddenly turn glum,and said,"I will loose you "in his broken speech. "I will miss you too Richard "I replied and walked out of his room. Hardheartedly swiped my card at the exit door,wishing to spend more time with Richard.....

BY

PIUSHA