SORTED, growing up, coming out & finding our place

Chapter 1
Hi, usually after hi there is a name but what name will fit in that missing slot? I have the name I grew up knowing but then I have the name that when I turned 13 realized it was the right fit, what would you choose?

Let's try this again. I am Ryder. This name is not my birth name and it never will be so but it is the name I chose, ok a little about me I am writing chapter 1 at the age of 13 crazy right. I am only a teenager while writing this but a lot has happened in my life and a lot of it sits freshly in my mind. Let's get started with this crazy life.

Ok let's start early on like how about my mum's pregnancy. My mum's pregnancy with me came at a bit of a shock because as of a young age my dad had been told he wasn't going to have kids so I have always been daddy's miracle child. Let's see if I remember this story that has been told to me hundreds of times.

When my mum found out she was pregnant dad was sitting at his playstation playing a game, then mum walks in and tells dad she is pregnant BANG down went the controller and he turns to look at mum not knowing if she was joking or not. Then he went into my oldest sister and said to her "try not to overreact but mum is having a baby" and the reply was a massive scream to which mum came running into the room.

Next, three kids came along and my parents relationship had broken down and built back up again, as their relationship had broken down my daddy Johnno and mum had gotten together and had two out of the five kids currently in the equation.

I am surprised you have read his far I am honestly not very interesting but if you have made it this far thank you for reading sorted and I honestly don't know what part of my life to explain next, but I think I will do when I was younger my Nan died.

When I was five my Nan died and it hurt a lot I still remember in blurry detail how we found out that Nan had passed away and how much it hurt and still hurts. It all started with a single heart attack that the doctors couldn't prevent and a phone call that hurt like nothing they could imagine.
Imagine getting a phone call saying that a beloved family member is having a heart attack and the doctors couldn't do anything about it. My parents called us into their room the morning after and told us the depressing news we sat there for ages and the only noise we could hear was the noise of crying.

Not long after Nan had died Shaylie had came along another one of dad's kids so then we had Linda, me, Chontae, William, Katy and Shaylie aswell as mum and dad living under the same roof imagine that, nine people living under the same roof.

Quite a few years later when I was ten DCP (department of child protecton) came knocking on our door with the cops so you must know what that means me and all my siblings are now in care and my mental health is below rock bottom.

It has been three depressing years in care and for me hardly any sibling contact and for a little while no contact with any family, now it is getting a little better I have sibling contact with my older sister and mum fortnightly, my younger sibling still not very often and my first access back with dad is next school holidays hopefully.

A little more about being in care. Everything you do has to go to your social worker then to his superviser which is sometimes enough but big things like loooong distance traveling It has to go through your social workers superviser and even there superviser sometimes.
It is not fun.

I am in residential care which is a completely different story. We have for different shifts morning (D4) day (D8) afternoon (A) and afternoon night (A/N). Morning and day are on at the same time but morning goes home at 10:00am and day stays till 3:00pm leaving when afternoon and afternoon night get here. The difference between these two are afternoon leaves at 10:00pm and afternoon night stay all night until 7:00 am when morning and day shift get in. Crazy right?

Plus everything we do is not allowed or the simplest things need to be locked up like slime for instance. We keep the pantry's locked and the sharps draw and I don't know why we lock the cutlery draw everything is locked as I said.
This is a temporary placement until they find a forever home but people don't usually want to
foster teenagers because of stereotypes such as they are messy disobedient kids. We aren't all messy and we aren't all disobedient.

School finally something usefully. School has been quite had the last three years and the kids don't understand what it's like to be in care and the teachers don't understand my situation as much as they say they do. I spend a lot of school hours falling behind but term four that is going to change.

I have to work harder than most kids to even get a B grade because I so signs of ADHD and lose focus very easily honestly I am still surprised that I am still writing this book with interest in it sometimes it can be very very annoying.

As well as undiagnosed ADHD I have a server case of deppresion and anxiety on top of that which isn't unusual with ADHD you like me can also get really high stress and what makes it worse is you think nobody cares because your hormone levels are out of whack.

I don't even get to hang out with friends outside of school my life is so striked and I along with many other think that DCP are out to ruin our lives along with many more kids lives, but others think that DCP help these many other young kids in care.