what really happens at summer camp

Its getting close to that time of year again,and as a former camp counselor allow me to be your tour guide on what really happens at summer camp this year and possibly every year until the end of time, sure your create bonds with your campers they are adorable sweet and funny in that way only kids can be. There is a dark side to summer camp that not many people know about, and its covered in semen. I worked at a summer camp and though I love working there I was almost driven crazy with all that went on.
One of the first things I discovered as a camp counselor is 10 year old boys are very clever perverts, the lady staff think its soooo cute when they beg for hugs and finnaly amonxed the plees of pleases and witha cherry on top they all give Iin because deep down every girl wants to be a mommy, but do the campers go for the hugs? oh no they reach out and get a big handfull of boobies thats right both boy and girl campers ask for hugs just to cope a feel, and in some cases get a full fledged motor boat. I cannot make this up. of course the counselors get creeped out but you cant hit the kids for being perverts, they are 10 so you just have to assume they are stupid, one of my campers convinced my female co staff that he did not know how to wipe his own ass, so he talked her into wiping it for him, I personally had been told by his mother to never believe anything he says because he is a pathalogical liar, so after the ordeal he told all his little buddies he got a hand job from miss nix so mr formerly known as poopie pants became mr hot shot man on campus, every counslors worse fear is a camper running away but we took pride in our camper snatching skills we knew they were miserable heck we prayed for an excuse to get to chase them down and tackle them with full force into the ground, these kids had pissed on us thrown feces at our faces and kicked our testicals into our throats more time than any person could count.
We would pray and pray and sure enough one kid would scream NO Im running away, and book it. then us as doting staff members would play rock paper scissors over who got to chase them down, it was never difficult when you have 3 feet over a kid its not hard to run them down, plus it kept you in shape.
Then you count to 10 because we have to be fair then the hunt is on, most of my escapess i got back within 3 minutes. usually they run away because their parents had spoiled them rotten and had complete control over their homes, then when they met us and we wernt buying their im god routine they threw fits and cried and swore every swear word imaginable. personally for me the worst was the masterbating, i had a cabin full of boys i had no idea how much kids today masterbate, its gross one kid did it so often that when we did his laundry we ended up breaking his sleeping bag in half......in half people so much semen had soaked into and dried that it made the fabric brittle. wtf! my co staff had the girls i personally did not like ever going to the girls cabin because they are just as bad as the boys so the older girls would do it, then at meetings the younger campers would ask why was so and so screaming loudly in her sleeping bag, and with orgasms being a very weird subject we would quickly change it tooooo hey who wants to go to the pool today? one time we were rock climbing and one of my campers was afraid of hights so as im climbing up next to him to talk him through it, he gives a actual mudslide to my co staff because he shit his pants in fear. the kid was perfectly safe, we were trying to calm him down but he got soo scared he explosive diarrhea ed through his gym shorts and 50 feet down onto my co staffs head the poor poor girl i felt so bad. so because he soiled the entire rope we had to burn a 500 dollar climbing rope due to the fact it became a biohazzard.
I was so glad we didnt have teenagers those staff had to deal with campers running off to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night to go to the "bathroom" when in actuality they were having screw parties in the woods, that was a akward letter home to mom and dad and it was even weirder when we got the reply well it was bound to happen eventually at least she got it over with at camp.........face palm.
One time while my group was in the woods my campers discovered if they smash rocks together you get dust.....i told them i wouldnt do that your going to smash your hand. they ignore me and continue. sooo i have to take a dump i take the dump shovel go off into the woods and dig my poo hole and assume the position, im relaxing my anal muscles when i hear a rustle in the leaves and i look over to see a black bear taking a dump as well....i had never taken a quicker crap in my life i didnt even bury the poo i ran back to camp said uh we should be careful because theres a bear over there, my camper who was smashing rocks laughs and says hahahaha you were so scared you craped yourself, fwp ting aaaaaaaahhhhhh he smashed his hand with the rock the bone in his finger was showing. so me being the kid man i am take off one of my shirts hold it over his hand to lessen the bleeding mind you his hand is squirting blood hes screaming and crying so i have to think fast to calm him down, i tell him its ok its ok im fine. he says fuck you my fingers bleeding and im like i know im fine now im just gonna chop it off, he tries to pull away but i had hold of his hand so his eyes are closed and he actually thinks hes gonna get his finger cut off so i tell him how when he goes back to school how scars are considered sexy and hes stops screaming so i can press the skin back on and clean it and bandage up his hand. so i tell him im done and he goes ujp to my co staff and says in his manliest voice possible "hey" so i hear ya think battle wounds are sexy. i got this from punching out a bear. so laughingly says my here and hands him a bowl of mac n cheese. i shoudl mention we were 25 miles from anywere so a hospital was out of the question. i purposly jumped around with the various stories because its meant to be chaotic just like my experience as a camp counselor, i hope you enjoyed it thank you..