Poem -

If only....

If only we could switch places for a week.
Then you could feel how loved you truly are.

And I could understand you more clearly.

You would see how valuable your presence is.

I would find the wisdom to help you heal.

You'd understand a mother's heart.

I'd understand your depression and pain.

If only we could switch places for a week.

You could hear my whispered prayers.

I could face your demons and fears.

You would understand my grief for you.

I would understand why your words are sharp.

You'd see how much I've sacrifed.

I'd feel your bitterness of not having a childhood.

If only we could switch places for a week.

You could feel my fear of losing you. 

I could understand your desperation to get high. 

You would feel my failures and regrets.

I would feel your heartbreaks and disappointments.

You'd understand my physical pain.

I'd feel your relief from your torment.

If only we could switch places for a week.

You could see how I held my breath as you danced with fire.

I could see how my trauma had affected you.

You would understand the pain I needed to numb.

I would feel all the times you needed me and I wasn't there.

You'd see that love was foreign to me.

I'd see what my criticism did to you.

If only we could switch places for a week.

You could understand that I only wished you happiness.

I could feel your love for me.

We would both have more empathy for each other. 

If only we could switch places for a week.

Son, I love you more then you could comprehend.

My dream for you is peace, love, contentment and thriving in you or purpose.

 

Love,

Mom

 

 

L. Mack 

 

11/09/2025

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Comments

author
Marion

Oh god... what a brutally honest piece
( whether true or not) we never make perfect parents and the addictions of our children haunt us. The double sided trauma here is hard to read. Beautifully written Lori x

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