4 am Questions

I have a lot of questions, I think I always have, But these are really frustrating so I'm going to write them out.

Why has it never felt right playing by the rules?
Why do I hate this world so much but see beauty in it too?
Why do we all tell stories of a better way but yet none of it is real?
 
If we all truly wish no harm to the person next to us,  then who broke the chain huh? What's the deal?
If no one knows what's truly best for you, why are we still seeking for each others approval?

Why do I know I'm not the only one that knows we all go along just pretending it's not me? because know matter what's your status in this life we all started out as kids.

How comes no one likes to be forced but yet we force ourselves?

These weren't the questions that first came into my head but I thought I'd start some where to get a bit of relief, I thank you if you are listening? 

I'll now take a deep breath to find my answer within... walking on the beach after no sleep, finding my ball that got lost by somebodys dogs and any other rubbish that I find once I finish this line....

Back home and ready to send it out into the World Wide Web, wondering if it will have any difference not being just in my head?