A life of sorts

Dealt a crap hand from day one
My life had only just begun
Already fighting impossible odds
Those religious “its up to the gods”
I made it but the scars i bear
Invisible unable to share why care
Keeping it in locked deep away
Outwardly happy ill say im ok
Then when days black dog rears
its head
Memories that once thought buried
Recalled rerun but the same outcome
They haunt me still im not done yet
Its a chain i wear will i ever get
Free from that past i think not
Forever there a black spot