A TRILOGY OF FICTION

My story is simple and its true
But it's also a trilogy of fiction 
When I say fiction, I mean parts that I will deny
Because it's my true feelings 
but I don't  want anyone to know it's my feelings or is it not
that's just the poet in me

I'm a simple man ,not too flashy 
And not too loud
I like to keep my conversation meaningful and respectful
And I'm not a fan of big crowds

I have never fell in love 
In my whole entire life
I was tricked into a situation
And I put the other person feelings before mines

To me, love was just an illusion
That I wanted no part of 
Life had rained some lemons on me
And I fulfil my part and did my duty

I walked on a narrow road
And I fell to the side
But I dust myself off 
And get me back on the ride

Somehow I accept that love has passed me by
And I was happy because I didn't need the drama
So I was going through the motions
Thinking" the well of love had run dry

Then out of nowhere
I don't know what happen
I saw a girl 
And I don't know what happen

My heart began to race 
And I become nervous
And I couldn't help myself
From stealing a glimpse of her every time she passes

And then one day 
She asks me to help someone
And I turn and look in her eyes
And I , I couldn't stop My heart

I couldn't stop myself from falling in love 
Why , why , no no no way .this is not true
What is wrong with me 
I'M IN LOVE " me  "KAZ ISHMAEL " was in love

Oh no oh no oh no oh no 
No this is not true
It's a lie ..My heart is playing  tricks on me
" Kaz Ishmael " is in love.

What do I do , what do I do now
But there was nothing, I could have done
My heart had left me , It had left me 
And now it belongs to someone else
 
She sets my heart on fire
So I stood in the rain
But all that did was raise my desire
and now I miss her even more.

Then I began to feel sad
I was now in a strange place
My heart was not with me again
It was now with her
 
But she didn't know that she had it
She didn't know that I had fallen in love with her 
She didn't even know me
Nor did I know her

But she was so gentle and kind
And her voice was so sweet and soft
And every time she looks at me 
I would crumble inside

And just wanted to see her angelic face 
Every chance that I can get to see her
I would just go in the area to see her 
And pretend that I don't notice her

I was always a mountain
A solid rock
A man with a heart of steel
But now I melt at the sight of her

In front her I become helpless
A shy timid nervous helpless fool in love
I was always a superman
But she was now my kryptonite

Is this how love feels like
I write about love in my poems
Now I fell inside of my own poems
" help I've fallen and I can't get out"

But I didn't want to get out
I want to stay in this magical feelings
 that she makes me feel
And it was a bittersweet feeling

If I was in my younger years
I would have won her heart
And I would have cherished her love forever
And make her fall in love with me every day

I would have cook for her 
And wash her clothes 
And make her chicken soup If she gets sick
And hold the tissue for her to blow her nose

And take her on vacations 
And shopping and picnics 
And to Trinidad and Tobago
And teach her to dance soca chutney and calypso

And massage her feet if it hurts
And kiss her hands
And tickle and kiss her toes 
Until she laughs

She is the love of my life
And she would never get to know it
And if by chance she does get to know
Then I will flat out lie and denied it
 
Because never in a million years 
Would someone so perfect like her
 ever like someone like me
But for the next million years
Someone " who is me Kaz Ishmael
 " will be in love with her