Abuse

ABUSE
As he begins to strip
My self-worth, layer by layer
Until there was nothing left of my identity
(ABUSE!!!!)
Yet starting to lose myself because of my identity was stripped
Of who I used to be
As I can remember the sour whisper of
Him saying it's ok this is right
Thinking to myself what is happening to me
As he start to kiss my neck rubbing my thighs up and down
Thinking to myself what is happening to me
(ABUSE!!!!)
SEXUAL ABUSE
Struggling try to get him up off of me
That's when he got physical
Trying to get up
Being slammed back down, my wristed being gripped so tightly
Thinking to myself what is happening to me
Screaming for help but no one's coming to save me
saying stop but that not working
As i began to struggle he began to get more physical
Crying out asking him to please stop
He did once he was satisfied
Curling up in a ball against the wall crying out
(ABUSE!!!!)
PHYSICAL ABUSE
As I began to get older I was seeking out to the wrong men
The ones that would physically hurt me
Because that is what I was accustomed to
From black eyes too big bruises
Wanting to leave the relationship but afraid of him
Building up my confidence to leave having to be strong
(ABUSE!!!!)
PHYSICAL ABUSE
How much longer will I have to be
Beaten bruised and dragged through the mud
Emotionally before I can stand strong
Or just become a empty shell
As i cant stand strong I become this vulnerable empty shell
VERBALLY / EMOTIONALLY
( ABUSE!!!!)
Getting shoved in the lockers for being gay
Hearing them saying
Nigga you gay
You a fucking fagget
Stop acting like a bitch
Emotions rolling me into my empty shell
Telling myself to stand strong
But I can't
VERBALLY / EMOTIONALLY
( ABUSE!!!!)
Pushed in a corner by my partner
Screaming at the top of his lungs
You aint shit
You will never be shit
Leave and I bet you will never find someone like me
manipulating me into thinking I needed him
Hurting me not only verbally and emotionally
But also mentally
Telling myself to stand strong
VERBALLY / EMOTIONALLY
( ABUSE!!!!)
Attempting to gain back control of my life
Running back into my empty shell where I felt at ease
Continuously being manipulated
Telling myself to stand strong
Thinking you must
Rediscover your self-worth
VERBALLY / EMOTIONALLY
( ABUSE!!!!)
In this empty shell
As I look at the knife on the counter
As I look at the rope hanging from the window ledge
As I look at the bottle of pills sitting on my side table
Thinking to myself this could be the way out
Suicide Suicide Suicide
Deep down in my soul i'm crying out
For help to pick myself back up and together
Layer by layer of my
Self-worth and identity
By: Shakur Lewis

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Comments
This was really good,very emotional and touching
Thanks I really appreciate it. Tell others about it and vote.
Shakur, very powerful indeed....good poetry (to me) is all about story telling and unique fresh expression, and with the narrative of self esteem, abuse, you painted a stark reality, holding nothing back....you're an excellent poet with excellent expression....you write with clarity courage and intelligence (not sure where I can vote, but good luck) cheers poet
Thanks I really appreciate it