Avalanche
Alternate: Poets Battle
Lying through my teeth
"Hooked a big one"
A coral reef.
Arm the barracks!
Storm the walls!
Guns in holsters,
Whilst the blades unsheath.
Under the weather? No
Not now, not ever,
A conscious mind,
A solid stance
And light as a feather.
But likewise, it remains.
A parasite fueled by flame.
And I`m lost. I`m cold.
Silly hedge maze.
And from the waters,
Whispering. It betrays.
As if I`m
Pausing while I`m
Walking while I`m
Running out of words
A working title
A working fight that`ll
Help me prove a sense of worth
A fragile mind
A spirit dims
Now, these demons go unearthed.
Safe and sound.
Forgot and found.
Forged and sinned from birth.
Yet they tell me,
Flowers bloom in the fire.
It`s elegant, obscene.
Nevertheless the facts.
While I`m looking through a screen,
Never to interact,
I`m losing the poet`s battle, distract.
And please don't intervene
A messy head,
Put my life at rest.
From a
A war that goes unseen.
Get some rest.
The Fish of the Sea.
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Comments
Abfab & so beautifully penned my lovely poetic friend 🌹🌹🌹
Thanks so much Jill! Glad you liked it my friend!
🌹💕🌹
Really good write Max...there is a sense of chasing a tired tale throughout X
Awww shucks Marion! Thank you so much Glad you liked it my friend~
Sublime muse with superb phrasings wow! A messy head to forget the woes of people's death throes,' yeah man anything to forget the bloodied atrocities. Kudos for this great poem!!
Plz do read and comment my newest poem too.
Thanks so much for reading my work Zaynab! It seems like ages since we talked my friend, but look at how far I've come! I'll be definitely back to comment soon, though i have a few others to check on first~
Aye, the fight not to lose your head over stuff (especially when you hooked a good thought), well described. It may be unseen, indeed, but never unnoticed in head and heart. Love this one🙏
Thank you so much John for the continued support of my work! Very true, that last week has been hard for me, but then again that's what loved ones are for eh? I am so very sorry, I only just saw your previous comment, a miss understanding, of course I dont think like is a waste of time my friend. Peace and smiles to you as always! Your friend Max
Hi, Max, I am grateful to you for writing such stuff, so I can use my old university training as a 'literary critic' once in a while🤣😇 I love it that you are finding your voice in poetry. In my tuinr (I had missed the piece for the work situation is quite hellish this month - the Dutch Tax Authorities require our clients to do a VAT-declaration (turnover VAT to be paid and paid VAT to claim) over the second quarter. This means no days of except for Sundays this month. However: July 30th 12.00 hrs Dutch time computer shut down and off to France for some 16 days with the wife🤣😇.
Keep safe and no worries, mate.
XD thank you so much again my friend, I look up to you as always~ Your friend Max
Max, wow, a real tour de force outpouring on display here.
A Vesuvius of catharsis you have vented and thank heavens for doing so.
There is so much on offer and to take in and loved reading this part among others, which sums up one's thought processes and angst, some and many times, perhaps both...
'A fragile mind
A spirit dims
Now, these demons go unearthed.'
For it's not simply plain sailing when running on empty.
Hang in there Max and thank you and for what you want to achieve, for slowly but surely you'll get there, who knows or can really say, but it might dawn earlier than you think or one day, expect.
All the best my friend, your friend Shaun.
Thank you so much Shaun, upon all my priorities, going back to Cosmos is on top for tomorrow. Really chuffed that you liked this one my friend. Hope to catch up soon! Famous last words am I right?!
I knew it Max, I am late. But as they say “better late than never eh” :)
This is such a great offload of a poet in the thick of it. I sense chaos and a feeling of uncontrollable plummeting. Your rhyming becomes exquisite
not only is the rhyming here sublime, but it drives the motion of the feeling you are writing in this moment. A total sense of loss of control. Like a runaway train that you are grabbing the breaks to, and with determination trying to steer it onto the right track, that will at last take you to that destination you long to reach. Something many who come to read this, will relate to.
You are on fire with your writing Max. Beautiful to watch
Your friend
Gwen :)
Gwen, to be honest, though I love everyone's super generous support on Cosmos, in all honesty, this one did bring a smile to my face. Really, although we have just gone into Lockdown, I have been feeling a whole lot better in mindset over the last few days. You are such a kind commenter of my work, not only supporting me but digging deep to unearth the soil of meaning in my work. I used to be like that... these days, I have much less time on my hand... In your analysis, you are so very correct, my intention exactly... a runaway train. What can I say Gwen, I wish there was a button for more than a follow, more than a comment, more than a vote sometimes. That just how I feel right now~ Thank you so much
So deserving my friend. I do love watching your writing flourish on Cosmo :) I too sometimes wish there was another button to click. Looking forward to reading more from you
your friend
Gwen :)
That opening stanza is a killer, whether sheathed or unsheathed .. and then, just like some avalanche or tsunami, it gained momentum growing even stronger ......................... until that overwhelming summative line 'Get some rest' ... Yep, that does it for me almost evert time ...
The white fuzz of writers block is a terrible affliction that hits us all from time to time ............................. I measure time by it these daze ...... spot on sir Max .. unconditionally pinned ............ Neville:)