Back in the days ?

When I was a kid old folkies sayings were so weird
Like me Dad saying to me 
‘Al wipe that smile off ya sticky face”
Well is this really possible I feared ?

& The time my Auntie Annie
She says to my best friend
“You’ve got as much lip as the cat wipes its ass with”
Joanna ran away laughing in the end

Haha have you ever heard of this?
“That will be a pig’s foot in the morning”
Mam used to say that to my sis 
Coz she wanted her to brush her hair so groaning 

“She’d make a glass eye cry”
Well have you ever, how absurd
Didn’t those oldies come out with daft odd words!

“Who knitted ya face & dropped a stitch”
Huh this was a usual from Uncle Tam
I used to run & tell my Mam 

“Well I’ll go to the end of our street’
Go on then I used to think to Aunt Peg
Tho she never got up & even moved a leg 

“She wouldn’t laugh if she saw a chair walk”
What the hells that about
My Uncle friend Harry used to shout!!

“Don’t look at me with those eyes”
Eh well who’s eyes can I look at you I’m thinking with my sighs

“If you want to act like a child, I’ll treat you like one”
But Mam I am but a child when all is said & done

“Ask a stupid question, get a stupid answer
I’d be thiinking but why on earth would I want to
Mam you do a load of balloo

“Stop crying of I’ll give you something to cry about”
Oh ay like you can actually stop cries
When the tears are streaming from your eyes

All these crazy ridiculous sayings
That our parents used to say
Didn’t they realise that it never made any sense in any way?