BREATHE
Everyday is hard and painful not loving what i see in the mirror and fear that everyone knows what I am trying to hide.
I am still dying of a low death see the agonizing pain to get out of my bed, to get out of my head feels like my skin is peeling off my flesh as I slowly move from my bed I mean, my oxygen, But I still didn’t die see
The confidence, the ambition, the energy I tare from the bottom of my burning stomach to my aching chest to get up the courage to go to school to my coward throat for that day because I’ve already missed two days. Just for me to choke on it,Â
gasping for airÂ
I run back to my bed, I mean my oxygen because I can’t breath, yes I got out of bed today an yess(sigh) I did almost die.
To you I might sound dramatic but I am very use to that. Every “she’s dramatic”Every “she’ll get over it” Every she is just lazy” is just a another stab I take the more weak I become, the more blood I lose, the closer I get to being defeated by the battle that I try to win every day.wounded....Just Incase your wondering I STILL DIDNT DIE.Â
See i build strength everyday to survive for the ones I love because everyday I lose the strength to live.Â
Yes, it’s exhausting and Yes I can’t let them down that’s probably why I still can’t breath on my own.Â
BecauseÂ
No one cares that when I leave my bed, I mean my oxygen tank. I am suffocating myself everyday pretending that I am okay, that I am taking steps,that I am succeeding, still pretending my mental is fine just so I can’t feel the pain of being judged,of being a disappointment, of being a failure, because I’m literally still standing on that same exact step wounded.i still didn’t die
 Just so they don’t see the constant battle of me trying to get back to my bed I mean breathing. So 3 hours of suffocating I mean hanging means 3 days of bed I mean breathing, pretending I can breath because nobody care that I can’t because I cracked a few jokes, and faked a couple smiles, and they heard a fake laughter coming from my mask that I have grown so comfortable wearing. Yes I’m dying a slow death and Yess I am still alive Thanks to my bed I mean oxygen I AM STILL BREATHING
Support CosmoFunnel.com
You can help support the upkeep of CosmoFunnel.com via PayPal.
Comments
Hey MYSTERIOUSLY!!....... there is VERY strong sense of integrity running throughout this piece....... It leaps off of the page because of the overwhelming honesty that speaks so openly to the reader...... with phrasing that is undeniably your own,,,,,,, Uniquely crafted poetic prose that sings of the dichotomy that is YOU......a battle that rages within you.... where there mirror is (at the same time) your friend & your enemy!! ~
            ~. "Not loving what I see in the mirror and
                  Fear that everyone knows what I'm trying to hide..."
A fine début write.......ALLSTARS!!......well done dear poet sister!!...... and.......WELCOME to COSMO!!.........LOVE & ROCKETS!!......T xo. : )
Ps. You might want to edit your title and two or three places within the poem where you misspell the word BREATHE..... it has an "E" on the end of it in most instances..... no big deal..... it's one of the words that many, many, poets misspell....... anyway!!......... keep 'em comin' !!
Â
Thank you, I really appreciate your knowledge and honesty about how you feel. Hopefully other feel the same as well. I am taking your advice and adding E to the title ?. I hoping you enjoy the rest of my poetry.Â