Chemical Imbalance

You could be in a room full of people
where 
everyone is talking 
laughing
having a good time

but not you
you feel alone.

Your physical body is present
But your mind is elsewhere
You want to be ok and feel like them

all joyous.
 
But, 

the more you try
the more your mind races
and the heavier and darker
the clouds appear over your head
which you are only able to feel the heaviness of

You hear a thunderstorm nearby

and start to breathe heavily, trying to keep it together 
But
the storm is coming
no way out of it now
It's starting to drizzle
and,
someone asks if you are ok

You respond with a
no,
your voice has a crack in it
and your throat feels like it's on fire
as it proceeds to rain harder

You don't want the storm to impact everyone

so you excuse yourself
and quickly shuffle to the restroom 
where the downpour happens
You say to yourself
"I don’t understand this.”
Everything in your life is good
you have friends
family
food on the table
a
Job
But, 
none of that matters in the moment

You want to be ok
but not today,

One day,
because no storm can last forever.
o.k.r