Clawing at Innocence

It started back in 6th grade
When a group of boys thought it was okay
To just come on in because my parents weren’t home
Even though I had told them no 
They pinned me to my bed 
and touched me in ways that made me feel dead inside
But what really left me confused 
was when I told people I knew and they turned their back on me. 
You see those boys were popular 
And I was just awkward
Why would they ever want me
So they got to play varsity 
And I struggled to make it through a day

Fast forward several years 
Mix in some beers
And now I was just asking for it
I liked my dresses too short and my shirts too low
So I was asking to be groped by someone that I didn’t know
I was so confused by the mixed signals all around me
“You have no worth except for your body”
“Quit showing off your body”
I felt dead inside 
So I tried to hide 
at the bottom of a bottle
But it never worked
Living at the clubs 
Meant I just kept on getting touched
And I hated myself more as each day went by
But I couldn’t figure out why
Because this society taught me to base my worth on what men thought of me
and nobody told me that’s not healthy

Fast forward a few years and I’m out at the lake
And now there’s less clothes than ever so it’s easier for the men to take exactly what they want
Snapping my bottoms and undoing my tops
And I just want to know if this ever stops
Because I’ve lost all hope
I’m still searching for rescue in a shot of whiskey 
And hoping that someday my worth as a person is what he’ll see

And I still can’t talk about the worst of offenses
because it’s offensive to every one of my senses
I still feel shame
And I still feel afraid
and no matter how many safe spaces you make
I still know I’ll be judged, and my reputation will be raked over the coals
because we still have a long way to go 
Until we find acceptance

We have to be done 
Letting our lives be run
By these pieces of scum 
Who just take what they want
You see our little girls deserve so much more
Than to be felt up on some sweaty dance floor
Nobody deserves to have to grow up that fast
Because some man can’t keep his hands off their ass
We need to stand together and have each other’s backs
Instead of having to worry about incoming attacks from our sisters
It’s time to lend a helping hand to those who can’t take a stand on their own 

Every time he forced me to spit out a lie
Left him one less place in the dark to hide
It’s time to drag it all into the light
And start up one hell of a difficult fight
It won’t be easy, it’s gonna get rough
But it’s time to say enough is enough
Put on your gloves and buckle up
because I see you asshole 
And your time is up