Dark Wordplay

A final thought!

Bitter to the taste is loneliness! Not to be alone, but that i have chosen this.
Sweet is the victory of my independence and Jealous are thoughs of my transcendence.

I stipulate through my discontent then capitulate and accept my fate, humbly denying I am a reprobate I hesitate then ejaculate my thoughts as they are the mementos of my existence,
constantly tapping at my shoulder despite my resistance. You can't forget them! i try and replace them with love now an again but in the end there still tapping, tapping even when I'm napping, wake up! have you forgotten my name? don't you remember the pain, flashing back to a life insane, happiness estranged I attempt to rearrange my thoughts once more trying to put them away and close the door for ever more.

A somber silence now, the only emotion around. On my empty face I see, A testament to the rest of me, what's left to be with all sincerity I pray to thee to set me free.

I'm on my knees and as I beg and pleed, take back what you've cursed abundantly,  exquisitely painfully as I lay here and my soul begins to bleed, these are my final thoughts demonstrably! 
Proving this life was just not meant to be.