Poem -

Don't Block My Exit

Don't Block My Exit

It was too heavy

We walked through

The jungle carrying it

with both arms and backs

For it was too great

Even for the strength that we lacked

For a fortnight we saw nothing but

Rain and guilt poor from the sky

And land collectively on our backs

And our hands were covered in god's

Thread as we said our prayers and went to bed

When we awoke the pain failed to reside

It had only increased

And every single day we prayed like priests

But ironically priests we were the least

The sinners, the ones in need of saving

We saw our conscience sitting in the field

And simply kept on waving

Depravity laughed in our faces

When we came to consciousness

And saw the blood

He only tried to help us

And we made his grave the mud

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Comments

author
BLOSSOM

Like this curious!  On the fifth line down not sure I would use the word 'massive', it jarred a little.  I would have said something like 'For it was too great' or something like that. Just mho lol!:)  On the 17th line down Curious I think you meant to put conscience, not conscious but just a typo lol!!!  Like your style of writing Curious, much enjoyed:)

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author
Curious Onlooker

Thanks Blossom for your constructive criticism I'll work on it :)

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